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A Guide to Incorporating Toys in Partnered Sex

Who decided sex toys are just for solo sex? We encourage our VUSH babes to use their vibes with their partners, as well as in their own time.


Why should I use toys during sex?

Toys are a great way to mix things up in the bedroom and inspire some creativity rather than sticking to the same routine. They add to the experience! They’re not a replacement for partners or a sign that things are going wrong. Vibrators provide a completely different experience to bodies. Hands, tongues and genitals simply can’t replicate the sensations that vibrators produce, and vice versa.

Even if you’re a total sexpert by yourself, you might still have trouble getting to the finish line with a partner. That’s okay! Many people with vaginas struggle to orgasm through intercourse alone. Give your clit the love it deserves by adding a clitoral vibrator during intercourse. There’s nothing wrong with using your vibrator during partnered sex to replicate the orgasms you’re having by yourself.

How do I talk to my partner about using toys during sex?

When asking your partner what they think of using toys together, we hope it's a no brainer. Toys bring extra pleasure and increase the chance of orgasm, your partner should be excited by this concept. How is you enjoying yourself not a turn on? There’s nothing hotter than seeing someone in a pleasurable state, that alone should be enough for your partner to give an enthusiastic YES to the use of toys during sex.

However, we understand that this might not be an easy conversation for everyone. Because of poor education about vulva anatomy and harmful myths about sex toys, there can sometimes be shame surrounding the use of vibrators during sex. Address this within yourself first and make sure you’re comfortable using toys in front of others. Follow VUSH on Insta or Tik Tok to join the movement to normalise self pleasure and start the conversation.

When you’re ready to bring up the discussion with your partner, do it outside of the bedroom rather than springing it on them during sex. Chat during a cuddle on the couch for some intimacy, during dinner for something more serious, or while walking the dog if you’re striving for casual and easygoing. Start by mentioning something you love about your sex life, for example “I always feel so great when we do this position”, then follow it up with your suggestion, “I’d love to add a vibrator so we can finish together”. Explain that vibrators help you connect with your body on another level, and you’d like to share that with them. If this is all too scary, give them a lil hint hint by linking them this article or a post from our socials.

What type of toys should we use during sex?

Check out our couples play toys, a range of versatile sex toys designed with mutual pleasure in mind. From a pleasure ring designed for penetration (with rabbit ears for the receiving partner's pleasure), to a massage oil candle, we've got you covered.

  • Empress 2 would be your medium sized go-to for more pinpointed pleasure.
  • If you want something small and subtle, try our bullets vibes, Rose 2 or Gloss.
  • If you want a big toy that’s easy to handle without hands getting in the way, try Majesty 2.

  • Internal vibrators are lots of fun to use with a partner too (remember, not all sex needs to include penetration from a partner). Our G-spot vibes are great for a partner to use on you, or for you to use while they stimulate a different area of your body. Take things to the next level by both using a toy at the same time!


    Which sex positions can we do with toys?

    External vibrators can easily be added during intercourse in a variety of positions.

    • Cowgirl is great when you want to be in complete control of your pleasure. Try moving in sync with the vibrations.
    • Doggy style with a vibrator is a classic. This position can already be quite intense alone and would pair nicely with a powerful toy such as a wand.
    • The spooning position allows you or your partner to take control of the toy.

    There’s a never ending list of ways to have partnered fun with vibrators without intercourse too.

    • Mutual masturbation! You can both self pleasure lying on your backs next to each other.
    • Try letting your partner watch you use your toy (yes, this counts as sex).
    • Have your partner use your toy on you. Go the extra mile and have them also stimulate another part of your body at the same time, for example using an internal vibrator while stimulating your clit with their hands or tongue.
    • For something more intimate, try lying on your sides to face each other with legs intertwined.
    • For ultimate closeness, sit on your partner's lap in a straddle position. This is especially good when both partners have vulvas.

    While the current VUSH range is designed for vulvas, they can also be used on different parts of the body. Get creative and use our vibes on the neck, nipples, inner thighs, perineum or anus. The body has multiple erogenous zones, why limit yourself to the genitals? Explore our range of pink vibrators to find something you can enjoy together.


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