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How To Masturbate With a Vulva - Tools & Techniques

By Steph AndrewsSep 28, 2022

If you’re bordering on being sick of hearing about how important self love is without actually sharing how to put that into practice, this article is for you. We’ve spoken about the benefits of masturbating before, but you might still be wondering how to actually masturbate?

VUSH’s sexpert, Steph, has developed a masturbation guide specifically for people with vulvas, because we recognise that it can be hard to find resources on the nitty gritty of sex and pleasure. It wouldn’t be right to leave you to rely on porn or Hollywood movies as your guide to pleasure because they often include completely unrealistic representations of how vulvas and arousal actually work.

So, this is the real deal — a comprehensive guide on how to masturbate properly. Here’s everything you need to know about masturbation and pleasure if you have a vulva:

How to masturbate for vulva owners

Believe it or not, there are many different ways to masturbate, no matter what genitals you have. People with vulvas generally tend to use their with fingers or sex toys for pleasure (or let’s face it, other household items such as showerheads and sofa arms). They might enjoy internal vaginal penetration during masturbation or just external clitoral stimulation. The opportunities are endless, so experimenting with different tools, positions and movements is key to finding what works best when it comes to self pleasure.

Masturbating with fingers

Wondering how to masturbate with your hands? Using your fingers seems to be the best place to start for vulva owners. This is something that we may naturally explore as young children or teenagers, whether intentionally sexual or not, since self touch is a way for the body to self soothe.

There are many ways to use fingers or hands to masturbate, such as gently touching the outside of the clitoris, running your fingers along the labia lips, inserting one or two fingers into the vagina and stimulating the G-Spot, or cupping the entire vulva with one hand. We’ll get into exactly how to touch these different areas later in the article. To find out more about the vulva and masturbation, you can read our blog on anatomy and pleasure using a vulva.

Masturbating with vibrators

Another great way to masturbate is by using a sex toy designed specifically for the vulva. This is commonly done through external clitoral vibrators, or internal vibrators stimulating the G-Spot. Vibrators offer a unique sensation that cannot be achieved through stimulation with hands alone. People with vulvas are more likely to orgasm using a vibrator because of the consistent patterns and multiple pleasure settings available on the toy. This is a great option for people who find it hard to orgasm, or aren’t quite sure where to start on their masturbation journey. Browse the VUSH vibrator collection for inspiration!

Masturbating with showerheads

It is also not uncommon to use a showerhead to masturbate if you have a vulva! If you’re wondering how to masturbate in the shower and happen to own a hose showerhead, try detaching the showerhead and angling the running water towards the clitoris. Alternatively, depending on the water pressure and how much room you have in your shower, you could try sitting or lying down in the shower with the water running against the vulva (this is a good option for those without detachable showerheads). Some people enjoy this sensation in the bath if it is designed in a way that allows the vulva to fit nicely under the faucet. However it’s done, the goal is to use the sensation or pressure of the running water to stimulate the clitoris and provide pleasure!

Masturbating with lube

Lube is an essential when it comes to masturbating, particularly if you’re focusing on the clitoris more so than the vagina (because the vagina can create natural lubrication when aroused). Look for a water-based lubricant that is compatible with sex toys. Water-based lubricant doubles as a great option for partnered sex because it won’t deteriorate the material of a condom or stain a partner’s bedsheets.

Benefits of masturbating

There are a million and one benefits to masturbation, on top of the obvious one which is pleasure in the moment. Aside from providing a higher chance of orgasm, there are also many health benefits of masturbating. This includes improved sleep quality, higher productivity levels, reduced stress, better mood, alleviation of pain (including menstrual cramps), activation of pelvic muscles, and improved cognitive function. Read more about these benefits in our blog on the reasons to masturbate.

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What are the different types and areas of masturbation?

There are many different types of masturbation, it’s not just about the vagina! The type of masturbation that usually comes to mind is the use of hands to stimulate the clitoris and/or vagina. However, masturbation can come from clitoral, vaginal, or anal stimulation, along with combined stimulation or inclusion of other erogenous zones.

Clitoral

The clitoris is the most sensitive part of the vulva (even more sensitive than the vagina which is often assumed to be the most sexual part of the body!). The clitoris is a big internal network shaped like a wishbone, but the external part is composed of the little button at the top of the labia. The clitoris is actually equivalent to the penis in terms of sensitivity and erectile tissue. Just like the penis, it swells when aroused, and has a glans and a shaft that extend inside the body.

Clitoral stimulation using fingers should focus on rubbing, circling, tapping, stroking, figure eight or pulsing motions (yes, there are lots of different ways to touch one little magical area). There are also multiple toys designed specifically for the clitoris, including suction vibrators, bullet vibrators, dual-tip vibrators, and more.

Vaginal

The vagina is the area that most people think about when it comes to sex and masturbation. It’s the internal canal that can be penetrated using fingers, toys, or a penis (emphasis on internal, not to be confused with the vulva which is the whole external area of the genitals including the clitoris and labia). Inside the vagina, you can access the G-Spot, a general area against the vaginal walls which is really just the back of the clitoral network.

The G-Spot can be stimulated using a come-hither motion with fingers inside the vagina facing up towards the stomach, or alternatively using an internal vibrator. G-Spot vibrators are designed to stimulate the G-Spot but can also be used externally while you're getting warmed up. But the G-Spot is not the only part of the vagina to when masturbating! The entrance, or the first third, is actually the most sensitive part of the vagina. Using fingers to circle the vaginal entrance and play with the walls of the first third of the vagina can be very pleasurable. (This is why the act of initially inserting or pulling out a penis, dildo, or vibrator can feel like the nicest part of penetration.)

Vulval

General contact with the vulva can also be a great way to masturbate. The grinding sensation or gyrating movement is particularly fun for people with vulvas. Many people have experimented with rubbing their vulva against a sofa arm on the couch or enjoy grinding against a partner during sex. Some people have even invented vibrating pads for people with vulvas to grind on! These types of sexual activities are great ways to masturbate without hands. Incorporating vulva stimulation by cupping the vulva with your hands, using a vibrator around the entire vulva, or moving in a grinding motion during self pleasure can be a great addition to your masturbation practice.

Anal

Don’t forget the booty! The anus is a particularly pleasurable area for all body types and genders, including people with vulvas. It is often avoided due to fear of pain (and poo). The key is to take it slow and use lots of lube. Anal masturbation is a great thing to try, especially if you’re wanting to try anal play with a partner. It’s important to know how your booty works, and how much external prep is needed before you can move to internal play (make sure to warm up the whole vulva and arouse the entire body first).

External anal stimulation can include tapping or circling the hole with fingers, or using a vibrator against the external area. The anus can then be stimulated internally using fingers, starting with a pinky and moving up to the index finger or more than one finger. You can also use an internal vibrator, as long as it’s got a flared base that will stop the entire toy from being inserted (this can result in pain or the toy getting lost inside the body!).

Combo

Combining different areas during masturbation is often the most fun part. This can be done using fingers internally and toys externally, or vice versa. Try combining an internal G-Spot vibrator with external anal stimulation, or a clitoral vibrator with internal stimulation. There are evern sex toys designed for dual stimulation, such as rabbit vibrators. Rabbit vibrators can be used to target the G-Spot and clitoris at the same time, or even the anus and perineum.

Erogenous zones

You can also use fingers or toys to stimulate other erogenous zones (not just the ones in your pants). Erogenous zones are essentially any sensitive area of the body that can provide sexual stimulation, such as the nipples, inner thighs, ears, neck, lower body, and more. Try using a vibrator in one hand and gently caressing another erogenous zone with the other hand. Alternatively, focus on each erogenous zone, one at a time, to really get the whole body involved and spend time on foreplay to build arousal.

How to last longer masturbating?

How to last longer masturbating is a commonly asked question (yes, even for people with vulvas). Once you work out how you like to masturbate, it’s easy to get into a routine and reach orgasm before you’re ready to finish. Wondering how to masturbate and make it last? Here are our two main tips:

1. Variety

To avoid ending the self pleasure session before you’re ready, try mixing up the stimulation. It’s important to have variety within your masturbation practice so that your body doesn’t start to rely on the same type of sensation. Mixing it up can also help you last longer. If you feel like you’re going to orgasm but you don’t want to, change the pace or pressure of your touch, or switch from a steady vibration to a patterned setting on your vibrator. You might even discover something new that works just as well!

2. Edging

Another way to last longer during masturbation and sex is to try edging. Edging during masturbating is when you build sexual tension and feel yourself reaching your peak, but stopping before climax and taking the intensity back down a notch before building it back up. This act of teasing your body before orgasm increases your chance of maximising or intensifying the orgasm when it does eventually happen. Our hot tip is that once you reach 90% pleasure, bring it back down to 50%, then back up again, and repeat as many times as necessary before you’re ready to finish at 100%.

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